My shenanigans for tonight. ;)
Could it be possible that someone will at least love you again after he has left you for some goddamn reason? Like, telling he’s not ready? I’ve been in doubt since then, cause yes, he had told every one about that fucking reason but found out that he’s coming back to someone else. She asked, “Do you love her?” to which he replied, “I don’t know.” WTF? And then the second thing I found out was that he’s up to someone else again.. Like some sort of flirtation. I don’t even know now what’s the reason why he really did left me.. Yes he left me, but he never told me he isn’t in love with me anymore. I’m being fooled. I’m wrecked I know. I’m angry. Actually, I wanna curse him for giving me such pain. And really, sometimes, I just wanna breakdown. I want to forget about the sweetest nightmares of my life. I wanna go back to where it all had started.. and to do everything the right way, and then we’re going to be together.. Or even if we’re not really dating. Just at least friends. I just wanted to be someone else now. Why am I so weak? I’ve always told anyone that I know what I’m doing when seriously, I always needed someone who could cover me up. Anyone, could be my friends, loved ones, a stranger.. But can someone please tell me what to do now, cause I don’t anymore.
I want silence. But I’m hurting. I want to smile. I want to be happy. I want to stop thinking about him. Just every little thing about him. About us. I deserve better, that’s most people will say. But if these things are gonna happen to you, will you still accept that we deserve better? Or just stick to.. “He’s all I ever wanted and I know everything’s worth it in the end.”
Was it all just me?
Anonymous asked: I'm sorry that happen to you and I can't do anything. I hope you have a fine day tomorrow and best wish to you. Anonymous.
thank you.. I’m trying. :)
I was wrong, I admit. I’ve been so easy to just give it all in. My decisions are all wrong. Now, all it take is for me to live with it.. Loving someone is not enough because I’m never enough with that guy. Funny how can one be so stupid not to realize that she’s been played.. and that he’ll always win. The only thing that’s left for me to do is to let go. Because as much as I really want him to stay in my life. I couldn’t and if ever he want, II’m not going to let him. I’m going to have to protect myself from hurting because I’m damaged. I’m broke.
I love you.. but is that enough?
I’ve trusted you.. but fuck me in return.
Thanks. Well played.